I Really Like Him
by SilverDawn2010
Summary: For me, it was always her, always Amy. But for her, it was never me. [SonAmy role-reversal AU - angsty emotional drabble]
1. Chapter 1

SONIC

* * *

I don't want to make an introduction.

Tails is always telling me I need to slow down when I'm telling stories, give context, explain things more. But no, I don't have time for all that. Let me just get straight to it.

My girl is with another guy. Yeah, that's right – the most amazing girl in the world, that one that I've known my entire life, the one I've saved countless times, the one that I grew up with and have always admired – she's dating another dude. What? I can't believe it, man. Guess I always thought one day, she'd stop playing games, and me and her would finally get together. I mean, me and Amy have always been tight. Let's be honest, she keeps me out of trouble if anyone could. And now – now I find out she's into some other dude? Who does he think he is, trying to come in and get my girl? I don't even know anything about him, Amy just mentioned she was seeing someone, and now here I am stewing about it.

Yeah, that saying about how the hero always gets the girl? Yeah, that's a myth.

I'm just, angry. I know I shouldn't be, but I am.

What kills me, is what Amy said to me when she first mentioned this whole sitch'. She said so many things, but this one part keeps echoing in my head, over and over like a painful itch in my heart that won't go away.

_"I really like him…"_

How, how could she? What's wrong with _me_? Am I not the guy who was always there for her when she needed me most?

_"I really like him…"_

Him, a guy she probably just met, sweet-talked her, and somehow won her heart. What the hell did he do that I've never been able to, in years and years of knowing her?

_"I really like him…"_

Him. Him, and not me. She really likes him, and she never really seemed to care for me? I don't get it. Not at all. What could I have done differently?

_"I still want you to be happy."_

Yeah, way to hit a guy where it hurts, Ames. I know she doesn't mean it, but she's breaking my heart with this. I just… I feel tears coming on, and I never cry. I hate crying. I'm devastated, knowing that the girl I love more than anything, and have loved for years and years, chose someone else. She had the option to pick me over and over again, gave her every opportunity, but I'm left here with nothing but the memories we made together. Guess they'll always mean more to me than to her.

God, this is killing me, why? I'm the perfect guy for her, I'd treat her so well, I know everything she likes, I bought her ice cream, I've proposed as a joke (kinda not as a joke?), and I'd do anything to please her. We'd stay up late just talking, sharing stuff, getting closer. But apparently that's not enough. Apparently I'm second best.

For me, it was always her, always Amy. But for her, it was never me.

We've had moments in the past that made me think I'd finally broken through to her. I'd hold her a bit longer than usual, she'd compliment me, I'd blush and hide it and then she'd go on her way. And I'd dream and hope that one day she'd turn around and say she DID want to go on a date and we would and were so happy. But it never happened. It was never me that she was dreaming and thinking about and wanting. Guess I just thought.. one day, one day it'd be me. I'm not patient but the cool thing about Amy is she makes me want to wait. Hell, I'd wait all day just to hold her hand. Hafta admit, in the brief moments I carry her from danger, I'd go slower than I needed to just to hold her a millisecond longer. Amy made me do things that weren't like me at all, things I'd do just for her.

What was all of that for now? Had I just been wasting my time? I've been into her for years and I've made no secret about it, but she's never seemed to like me back, and it just boggles my mind. Everyone loves me. I'm Sonic. And she's gonna tell me some random dude out there is better than me. Hurts. I honestly want to reach into my chest and pull my heart out, straight up remove it from my body, just so I can stop feeling like this.

As I look back at all the times we had together, I wonder if there's anything I coulda done differently. But no, man, I gave it all I got, I always do. I put my heart and soul into this relationship to make it somethin'. And it never was.

While a huge part of me just wants to track this guy down, whoever he is, and kick him in the face, I know I can't do that. Amy's happy, and … I can't take that from her. I always kinda thought she was mine, even joked that I was her boyfriend. And she even played along sometimes…. But now, I realize that's not true, it's never been true. And my dreams of traveling the world together, with her by my side, just won't happen. This huge part of my heart has just been torn out and strangled and the worst part is, the _worst part_ is that I can't do anything about it. As much as I want to, I can't.

I don't want to give up, but I'm a gentleman, and I don't own her, I know that. Doesn't mean it hurts any less. Doesn't mean I'm happy about it. Doesn't mean we can still have the same friendship. I think I should just be alone for a bit, cause if I run into her new… boyfriend… who she really likes, I don't think I could keep it together.

I'm really bad at introductions, and feelings, and being a boyfriend apparently. All I can do now is hurt, and hide my tears, nurse this broken heart...and be what's left of me.


	2. Chapter 2

_CherryTheRose, Guest, Guest, Akari, Sir Rubio, XxCrimsonShadowxX: Thanks for your reviews! Okay, so I wasn't planning on continuing this... it was honestly written in one sitting as basically just heart vomit, but... y'all seemed to really like it! So here's the next chapter. Enjoy!_

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SONIC

Okay, so I met the guy. And you know what? He's not terrible. He's nice, I guess. Doesn't look like much, I'm way more handsome. Don't really get what Ames sees in him. But he's okay, can't really say much bad about him. I think he laughs too much. And he held Amy a bit too close, made her laugh too much, at a dumb joke that wasn't even funny. Probably won't treat her right, won't have her back like I do. I mean, he's basically a toothpick, no way he's gonna fight Eggman with me and Ames. She's probably stronger than him - the thought of him carrying her was sickening me. That was my job, she fit so perfectly in my arms. No other guy could hold her like I do, protectively, softly, securely… surely not magical perfect new boyfriend.

I wanna hate him, I wanna be mad at him, but I really can't. I wanna say that he's just not right for her, 'cause I know it in my heart that he's not. I am. I've always been. Amy's such a smart girl, how can she not see it?

What kills me though, is how Amy looked at him. She introduced me, kindly, but when she turned from me to him - I saw it. Her green eyes glittered, her cheeks pinked, her lips parted... He wrapped her in a side hug that made my blood boil, but Amy's resulting giggle turned my blood to ice. She likes him. She really likes him. Maybe even loves him.

My fingertips cut into my palms, and I can feel so much tension inside my heart. I'm jealous, okay? Never felt like this before and not sure what to do with it, with all this extra energy. I try and run, obviously, try and get out of my head. I feel like I'm stuck in here though, forced to replay memories and thoughts of Amy and her new guy. It's hard to think of anything else when she's probably out there loving on him, kissing, and so, so happy.

Why does she have to be happy with him, why not with me? We'd be so much happier together, I know it. I could make her giggle and blush even more, and better, than he could.

Truth is, I could have any girl I wanted. I have tons of fans all lining up to date me, be with me, but I don't want any of them. I don't have the history with them that I have with Amy. She's been there through everything, we've fought together, we have history. I saved her from Little Planet and she stole my heart ever since. She's seen me through some of my worst times, and I only feel like I'm me when I'm with her.

And this new guy! He doesn't have history with her. It seems like they just met and she's somehow smitten. It's just so not fair that I've been trying to get with Amy for weeks, with no success, and he comes in without barely trying and Amy already loves him. Like, what, how? Makes me think after all I've done, I never really had a chance. If some random dude can come outta nowhere and sweep her off her feet, then… then I guess I was never what she was looking for.

Damn.

I remember when I was the one to say to everyone we met: "Hiya, I'm Amy's boyfriend!" and she would roll her eyes and I swear that she would blush and say "No you're not, Sonic" in that sweet teasing voice. And I thought she was just playing hard to get. But now... now he's the one saying that he's Amy's boyfriend. And instead, she's turning to him with those gorgeous eyes and saying "yes you are"...

And I just... I can't be around her. Cause I know she'll just gush about _him_. Thing is, we have a date coming up. Guess I shouldn't use that word anymore, but we always meet on Saturday afternoon, she orders her favorite chicken sandwich and strawberry lemonade, I order my plate of chili dogs, and we people watch and chat and catch up and just be us. It's the only time I ever wanna be indoors for any period of time, but me and Ames can talk for hours about nothing at all. Isn't that… what love is supposed to be?

Tomorrow is Saturday, and I haven't asked Amy if she's still gonna meet me there, or if I should expect her to, or if I should expect her not to, or if I should ask her at all, or what. I wanna talk to her, but the thought of seeing her now, as I said, is making me nauseous. There's nothing I want more than to see her again, but I don't know, man.

My fingers hover over her number on my phone, her sweet pixelated face smiling up at me. It's my favorite picture of her, because she normally hates taking selfies but I said I wanted a cute picture of her on my phone and that's the one she took. So flawless, with no effort. Just lifted the phone up and turned her lips up and she becomes the most beautiful girl in the world. I swear she wakes up smelling like strawberries, her eyes gleaming and her quills cutely tousled. If only I could find out… if only other dude wasn't finding out…

I set my phone down. No, I wasn't going to text her. We'd never confirmed our weekly date - meeting - before, so if I did it now, it'd be awkward, yeah? I'd just go to our usual spot and hope and wait (as best as I could) that she'd show up and we'd talk as if… as if nothing was wrong, nothing was different, my heart wasn't broken to a million pieces on the floor, and hers hadn't been given to a guy who'd never appreciate her or know her like I do.


	3. Chapter 3

_Sonicsis, CherryTheRose, SpeedsMyGame, Awesome know it all, Guest: Thanks for your reviews! Yeah, I spoiled all y'all by posting two chapters back to back, and here's another.. Seems like I finally got my mojo back. All I needed was just to write what was on my mind. ;) Enjoy a new chapter!_

AMY

Wow, it's been a whirlwind of a few days. Weeks, actually! Hard to believe I've known Dexter for less than like, forever. Met him at a chao garden picnic, and he just… I don't even know. Said all the right things, grabbed my hand out of nowhere and it just felt right. More right than anything ever had. It was like all my daydreams about romance had come together and I just knew this was finally what I was waiting for. I was instantly smitten with an intense ride of emotions and I haven't gotten off yet. I've been having too much fun!

Yeah, Dexter is my new boyfriend. He's a hedgehog, light blue, with even bluer eyes. Looking into them is like searching the cloudless sky, and as we get closer his pupils grow into a night sky, gleaming with the perfect set of stars as we kiss. Our lips brush with gentleness and passion and my heart explodes in my chest, leaving behind fireworks that crackle and fizzle and warm me from head to toe. I never want to stop, but my need for air finally overtook my need to feel his kiss.

We pull away, and suddenly I remember that we're in public, at my favorite ice cream place, and my strawberry goodness is melting in front of me, and I don't even care. I giggle at bit and nuzzle his nose before sitting back in my chair, hoping I could finish some more of my treat before it was liquid. Dex was better than ice cream, somehow.

I really like him.

"Ha, I couldn't help myself," he smirked at me, and I nodded with the spoon in my mouth.

"It was a nice intermission," I said after a swallow. "Oh, that reminds me, I was going to show you the movie poster, before I got so nicely distracted."

I opened my phone to show him the pic, when I saw I had a handful of notifications, missed texts from Sonic.

"Uh," I muttered, quickly opening the messages app while pinching my eyebrows together. "Hold on."

Dexter must have nodded but I was suddenly invested in my phone. I skimmed through the words, but they hit me so hard I had to stop and read them over again, my bottom lip lowered.

.

_'Hey are you almost here?' - 2:01  
__'I went ahead and ordered your lemonade so it'll be ready when you get here :)' - 2:04  
__'It's kinda crowded, taking forever. I musta ordered five min ago . ' - 2:06  
__'[Pic of the pink drink over ice, with a red striped straw] Waiting for ya, promise I won't take a sip' - 2:07  
__'I couldn't wait so I got my chili dogs too.' - 2:12  
__'It's really nice out today, let's go for a walk or something after you get here.' - 2:13_

_._

There were more messages, but I had to tap away. That was… over an hour ago. The blood had drained from my face, leaving me pale and still, gripping my phone with shaking yet sweaty palms. How could I forget? We always hung out on Saturdays, always. To think of me missing one, well… it was unthinkable. He was probably so mad at me. I felt guilt sink my heart like it were made of lead, and I frowned, gnawing at my lips.

A hand on my shoulder. "Hey, what happened?"

Oh right, Dex was here. "Nothing, I just… I realized I broke plans with a friend to be here."

"Oh, I'm sorry - " He gently rubbed at my shoulder, but I shrugged it.

"No, it's not a big deal, really. We just have this thing where we meet every Saturday and hang out. But it's fine, really."

Dexter said something else, but my thoughts were already wandering.

Sonic. My mind's eye was suddenly filled with images of the blue hedgehog, the hero, the goofball, and one of my best friends. I'd always felt a bit bad for him, as he had it bad for me (it was super obvious) but I've just never really be interested in him. I'm kinda a romance buff so I know what love is supposed to feel like, and Sonic has never sparked those magical feelings for me. That was even more obvious after I met Dexter, because he made me feel intense things I'd only read about before, things Sonic had never inspired in me. Sonic was like a warm hug after an exciting day, and Dex was like butterflies in my stomach and weak knees and everything I'd always wanted to feel. It wasn't my fault if Sonic didn't make my heart skip a beat. Maybe he was crushing on me, but I'd never felt the same.

But as soon as I started dating Dexter, Sonic had been there at the back of my mind, and I knew I'd have to tell him and break his heart a bit. He'd been so sad when I told him and introduced the two, but I'd promised myself I wouldn't let anything else change between us, I always wanted to be friends with him. Sonic had been so distant the past few days and I'd tried to reach out but he'd been quiet, way too quiet for Sonic.

But now I'd forgotten our date. And I felt horrible. So horrible I don't think I could enjoy the rest of my dessert. I was brought back to the present again, this time not from a mindblowing kiss, but from guilt and discomfort. My ice cream was basically soup at this point.

"Let me call him real quick, excuse me." I jumped from the table and tapped the call button. It rang, and rang, and rang, each one a pang of regret - oh damn, he must be pissed at me. Sonic waiting to answer his phone wasn't common. Sonic waiting on anything wasn't common. Yet he'd waited for me at the restaurant…

"_Hey, this Sonic, text me instead,_" I rolled my eyes at his voicemail before speaking. "Hey, this is Amy… look, I'm so sorry I missed our hangout time, Dex asked me to do something with him, and I just… forgot. I'm sorry, Sonic. Anyway, I might be free later if you want to do something then, just let me know. I'm so sorry, okay bye."

As soon as I hung up, my phone lit up again. I blinked, but quickly picked up.

"Hey Sonic. Look I'm so sorry - "

"No, no, don't wory 'bout it," He interrupted, his voice calm but strained. He hadn't been crying, had he? "It's fine."

"No, it's not, I should have at least said - "

"Don't, I get it, it's cool," he cut in again.

I inhaled, strangely not wanting forgiveness. I wanted him to be angry. I deserved it. I wanted him to still feel things for me. "Well, do you want to hang out later?"

"Nah, you should be with him."

The brokeness in his voice tugged at my heartstrings, and I could barely move. Maybe to anyone else, he sounded the same, but I knew him too well. Sonic hid his feelings, tried to play everything off as cool, but he wore his heart on his sleeve around me. He couldn't hide it.

But he didn't own me. I'd made that clear to him, and he was a nice enough guy to not push the issue too much. I didn't love him, and I deserved to be happy too. And that's how Dexter made me feel. The romantic tension between us was irresistible, and I'd always wanted to have that fairy-tale story.

Still, Sonic was a friend, and I should be there for him. Even if I kinda was the one to break his heart...

"No, I think I should be with you."

Dead silence on the other end of the phone, and I realized what I had just said. "I mean - " I tried to correct myself, hoping Sonic would interrupt me again, but he didn't. I breathed heavily, waiting to hear what he would dsy. But nothing. _Say something, Sonic_, I tried to telepathically send the message because my mouth wasn't working.

More long, awkward silence on the other end, and I pulled the phone from my ear just to make sure he hadn't hung up. He grinned back at me, motionlessly, and I knew right now, IRL, he must look much less thrilled than this picture of him. The seconds on the call time ticked up, but much slower than beat of my heart. I had to say something.

"Sonic, I'm sorry."

He finally spoke. "I am, too."

I exhaled, and wanted to say something, but there was nothing to say.

He beat me to the next words. "Never shoulda put you in this sitch, Ames. Have fun, okay? Take care."

"Wait - "

I half expected him to have already hung up, but he was still connected. Silently the seconds kept ticking, but Sonic got impatient after only a few.

"What? Are you gonna keep playing with my heart or…?"

"That's not fair," I whispered. "I said I was sorry, okay? I don't know what else to say."

"Then I'll go. I don't wanna keep you, unhappy."

I wanted to say something, but I was suddenly very confused from the intense pain in my heart. Was it pain for myself, or pain for him? Couldn't quite tell. I didn't want to hang up, I wanted to have our hang out session, I wanted to keep talking. And since Sonic was still on the line, he wanted the same thing.

But once again, reality hurt. I was on a date with another guy, and I knew Sonic and I didn't have a future, and it wouldn't be fair to keep leading him on if I felt nothing for him. Dex was the only one, ever, to satiate the romantic craving I'd had since I was a little girl. Dex had had me in a fantasy, up in the clouds for so long, that this crash to earth left me shattered. As amazing as he made me feel, I'd just realized the trade-off was that Sonic and I wouldn't be the same anymore. We couldn't. It was a high price to pay to be the happiest I'd ever been. Why couldn't I have both…?

"Okay Sonic, but let's talk soon, okay?"

"Yeah. See you later."

"Bye."

He finally hung up, the sad beep leaving me with a shiver. I stood still, holding my phone to my heart, willing myself not to cry. Dexter came up behind me a moment later, wrapping me in a warm, kind hug from the back. I leaned my head back to rest on his hand, and he kissed my forehead.

"Want me to take you home?"

His voice was like honey in my ears - he just knew exactly how I was feeling, without me saying a word.

"Please…"


	4. Chapter 4

_Sir Rubio, pamitydesu01, Awesome know it all, XxCrimsonShadowxX: Thanks for your reviews! I appreciate it! Thanks for all the faves and follows as well. _

_I kinda struggled to write this chapter, but I think what finally got me through it was just putting myself in an environment with few distractions. I tried so many times to work on it with music on, or TV on, or at work, etc, but once I got with just my cat and white noise, the words flowed. _

_Enjoy! _

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SONIC

Today's gonna be a good day. Heck, today IS a good day! Life is good again. Wanna know why? Because maybe the girl I used to love is dating someone else, but good for her, and him! I don't care. In fact, it's a good thing. Now that I know Amy has no intentions of ever being with me, no sense in moping about it. Nothing starts until I take action, so that's what I did. Hit up one of my fangirls and I have myself a new girl. Boom, just like that. Her name is Cindy and lemme tell ya, she's gorgeous. Magenta fur and quills, exotic purple eyes, and such a cool style.

Tails said I shouldn't be near a relationship right now, but what does the kid know? There's no such thing as moving on too fast, especially when you're me. If anything, I got over this heartbreak to slowly. Life is too short to miss what ya don't have!

So yeah, heartbreak is nothing to me. I'm just as strong and fast and cool as ever. Cindy and I have only hung out once but she's super into me and I know we're gonna have fun. And to be honest she's not super clingy at all, she lets me be - and it may be sour grapes but I know Amy would be super clingy, so who needs her, am I right? I'm happy. I don't need anything else. If it doesn't work out with Cindy, well, there are other girls out there. Livin' life fast and free, that's what I do best.

Anyway, so we're hanging out, it's a nice day, sitting on a park bench, my arm around her as we're both on our phones (and I'm totally not bored at all), sipping on drinks -

I get one text that instantly destroys my mood.

Just a few little words, and from anyone else they wouldn't mean anything. But these came from a pretty pink hedgehog that still owned a majority of real estate in my heart. I don't want her to, but apparently I don't have a choice in the matter. Every time she moves or breathes or texts me, I can't help but notice and give her my undivided attention. My heart was pounding just thinking of her, and I felt it clench under my ribcage as I opened the text.

"_Sonic, we need to talk_."

That was it. That was all it said. Ugh, why? About what? Why not just say the thing we need to talk about instead of saying we need to talk and making it a big deal? A low, guttural growl grumbled in my throat.

"Babe, what's wrong?"

I barely hear her, but Cindy's words do break me out of the paralytic trance caused by Amy's message.

"Nothing," I sighed, removing my arm from her shoulder so I can grip my phone with both hands. My peripheral vision caught Cindy's pout, but I ignored her.

The text was making me angry, I wanted to talk to Amy but every time I tried, it just hurt like hell. I hated this, I hated how five words from my ex-crush could instantly ruin me. Is that why they call it a crush, because of what it did to my heart? I didn't want to feel this way, I didn't want to feel anything about Amy. At this point I knew we'd never be the same, and I needed to let her be part of my past.

So I let it go, I ignored her text. I threw myself into the present moment and started making out with the girl I'm next to. In public, I don't care. I press my lips to hers, taste her tongue, with the hope that I'll soon forget about anything else but this sensation. It worked for a good few minutes. But then, all I could imagine was Amy's body under my hands, Amy's lips on my lips, Amy's scent and smile and taste. I wanted her close to me.

We stopped abruptly, and I ran away without a word, leaving my girl alone. I checked my phone as I ran, in part because I wanted to read the words again, and in part with some foolish hope that the text would have disappeared, but instead there was another.

_"__It's okay if you can't now, just text me later." _

I tucked it away and ran faster, my legs pumping with desperation, wanting the world to blur around me. And hours later, long after I'd left Cindy to just be alone, another dreaded buzz in my pocket that I still checked as fast as I could.

_"__Hey, please just text me." _

The rest of the day was a blur, and the night was long, lonely, and sleepless; only punctuated by a few more texts from Amy, begging me to talk to her.

_"__I didn't want to hurt you." _

_"__I never wanted to lose us." _

_"__Sonic I'm worried about you." _

I left my phone on the grass next to me as I stared up the night sky, wide-eyed yet exhausted. The rough turf scratched my fur, but I didn't move despite the irritation. I didn't feel much, unless you counted the gaping hole in my heart, desperate for something that wasn't there. It didn't hurt quite the same as yesterday, and the fact that I didn't feel anything anymore, hurt.

I felt so conflicted; wanting Amy next to me, wanting to talk to her, but terrified of what would happen if we did. Despite the voice at the back of my head screaming that I couldn't avoid her forever, guess I'm too damn stubborn not to try. I'm Sonic the Hedgehog and I don't just give up, no matter what. But I'd spent years and years of my life chasing after her, and I'd lost. I knew giving up on Amy would be the best for both of us.

Cindy hadn't been enough to distract me, so I'd try another girl. Literally any of the ones in my fan group chat would do. I leaned over to pick up my phone, suddenly reminded of how exhausted my body was from my aching arms that cracked in protest. Once the device was in my hands, though, my thumbs had a mind of their own and navigated straight to Amy's message thread. I scrolled up through the dozens of texts she'd sent me throughout the day. Her words were so kind and thoughtful and so _her_, they hurt, tearing at the jagged edges of my broken heart. Despite her kindness, her niceties, her pleading, Amy didn't love me. She never had.

I swiped away from her contact info and into the group chat. I had to chat someone else up. Had to, or I was going to go crazy. Scrolling through the list of potentials, couldn't help but feel I was on some one-sided version of tinder - I'd always known I was a hot commodity, but what was the point if the one girl I wanted still rejected me? Being around adoring fangirls had never turned me off more. But to hell with it, I just dont want to be alone. I'll pick the girl that looks the most like Amy and suck it up.

There - bubblegum pink fur, green eyes, even the same quill style. No way - my stomach turned painfully in my chest as I realized it was the real her, it was unmistakable. Her username matched to a T. What the hell was she doing in my fangirl group chat? Amy had always rolled her eyes at the group, and now…?

I tapped on her name to start a DM. My fingers didn't hesitate.

_"__Hey Ames." _

Within a millisecond she was typing back. _"OMG Sonic you're okay, I was so worried." _

_"Nah, I'm fine,"_ I typed. _"But it's way past your bedtime, what're you doing up? And better question, what are you doing **here**?"_

_"I've been looking for you everywhere! Someone told me you were online here so I had to check on you. Are you sure you're okay?"_

I could see her in my mind's eye perfectly - her outward anger that was just her way of showing she cared, hiding a deep concern and pure heart. I groaned and rolled onto my stomach. Maybe some weight on my torso would help the inner aches.

_"Sonic?"_

Yeesh, she was more impatient than me. _"Yeah."_

I paused, glancing to the side before typing a longer response. _"Listen, I just needed some space. But don't worry about me. I have a new girl now. We're getting along okay."_

"_Omg, that's great! I'm so happy for you!"_ She punctuated with so many hearts. _"You know what? We should have a double date sometime."_

A double date. Me, on a date with Amy Rose. Okay, so maybe it was not technically "with" her, but we'd still be together, on a date. Hell, I'd kinda lied about having a girl, but I could bring Cindy. I'd take it. I'm such a sucker for Ames that even an indirect date with her was enough to bring a smile to my face.

_"Sounds fun."_ I responded, and flipped to my back, resting my phone on my chest. Amy messaged back a simple heart, leaving a warmth in mine I hadn't felt all day.


	5. Chapter 5

_CrimsonShadow, Awesome know it all, Lady Sonamy: Thanks so much for your continued support of this story! It's been quite a fun ride to do something opposite of what SonAmy typically is. I hope you're having as much fun as I am. :) _

* * *

AMY

So, it sounds dumb to say out loud. And perhaps a tiny bit naive. But when I logged into Sonic's fangirl group chat in an attempt to find him, I was expecting to meet some obsessed but otherwise nice girls. I was certainly _not_ expecting the hate and vitriol and cruelty that was sent my way after just saying hey. I had been immediately bullied, called everything from ugly to a slut to "unworthy of Sonic's love." I was an idiot for not accepting him, and that meant it was perfectly okay to send me death and rape threats, and laugh about just how they'd do it. Every single part of me was mocked, from my personality, to my laugh, to my body.

_"__I hope Eggman finally kills her so Sonic can move on and date me instead." _

Even a few days later, the hurtful words of the psycho fangirls haunted my mind. I tossed and turned at night, unable to put my phone down for more than a few minutes, as the distraction of the screen was the only thing to cut through the memories of the hurtful things they called me. I wanted to crawl up into a hole and die, and be someone else, literally anyone else. I didn't want to be Sonic's crush anymore, I didn't want to be a famous hero, not if it meant there were a group of people I'd never even met that hated me just for existing.

_"__The reason she never posts selfies is because every time she tries, the camera breaks. I wouldn't want pictures of myself either if I looked like that. I'd probably kill myself." _

I've wanted to tell Dexter, but I wasn't sure the best way. I felt silly for being affected by mere words, and I kinda deserved it, didn't I? Looking back, I was kinda in "enemy territory", as they'd made me seem like public enemy number one. I'd scrolled through way too many of their comments, and that was my fault, so I had nothing to blame them on. I should have just left. Or I shouldn't have even gone on in the first place, what did I expect? I was happy to finally find Sonic again, but I should have had faith that he was okay, and would be. Besides, if I told Dexter I was going into a fangirl group of a guy that was really into me, he'd be suspicious.

_"__Her voice sounds like she's constantly swallowing helium. I bet when she's in bed all she can do is squeak." _

I couldn't stay away, though. Like a moth to a flame, I found myself going back to the toxic group chat, just so I could read what they were saying. I went online as invisible so they couldn't directly target me, but I could still read their comments. I'd tried to turn off my phone, delete my account, but even if I logged out, I could hear internal echoes of their mockery, and knowing that they were still out there talking about me was making me feel worse. My imagination was vivid with nightmares, causing me anxiety, and lead me back to the app - their words could not be any worse than what was in my head.

_"__She has such an ugly nose, flat faced bitch." _

It is? I pulled up my phone's front-facing camera to examine my muzzle, scrunching my nose up and turning to the side. I guess my face was a bit flat… but what really caught my gaze from the electronic mirror were my eyes - moist, tinted red, and tilted downward, as if reflecting a hollow sadness. I sniffed and wiped at them, not wanting Dex to see me like this. He was in just the other room, getting ready, and the last thing I wanted was for him to ask me how I was feeling. I'm not sure I was ready to get that vulnerable with him. Maybe he was my boyfriend, but I never wanted to be sad when I was around him… I'd just ruin the mood. No one wanted a sad girlfriend, that's what the movies taught me.

Anyway, as I said, Dex is getting ready, as tonight is our first double date with Sonic and his mysterious new girl. I knew nothing about her, not even her name, and I found myself very curious. Probably that was why I'd braved the horrible comments online, to try and learn a bit more about the new girl Sonic was dating. Come to think of it, why were they all hating on me and not her, whoever she was? She was officially with Sonic, yet I was still the one everyone hated. I didn't get it.

I mean, I _kinda_ get it, Sonic has a famous unrequited crush on me, and these girls are beyond obsessed with him, but still… it hurts nonetheless. And I couldn't help but worry that maybe something really was wrong with me for not wanting to get with such a great guy. I always came back to the same thing, though - I can't make my heart feel something it doesn't. I've never loved Sonic romantically, and it wouldn't be fair to either of us if I even gave him a chance.

"Amy, you look like someone died."

Dex's voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and I turned up to look at him. I forced a smile on, but it felt like more of a crooked wince. On my flat face.

"Nah, just, some people being mean to me online," I shrugged it off, setting aside my phone. I wish I could be more distracted by how handsome Dexter looked with his freshly washed quills and a purple bow tie around his neck.

He offered a kind smile. "I'd offer to beat 'em up for you, but I know you'd probably do it yourself. Don't let them get you down. It's just words, Amy. You're beautiful and amazing, they're just jealous. Now let's get going, yeah?"

His words were hardly reassuring, though I couldn't fault him for that. I shouldn't even had brought it up, I was being silly, I shouldn't listen to them. "Yeah."

Despite the sky darkening, the heat of the summer day was still suffocating. My hand was already starting to sweat after a few minutes of holding hands with my Dex. I'm glad we lived so close to the movies, because honestly all I wanted was for my mind to escape into a movie and forget this sudden hell I wish I weren't in.

To my surprise, though, Sonic was already waiting at the theater before we arrived. Dude had never been early in his life. I was so distracted by how striking he looked that I didn't even notice the most obvious thing - until Dex brought it up.

"Where is your girl?"

Sonic's jaw dropped. "Oh, uh, guess she's running late? Said she'd meet us here." He stood there awkwardly before for a second, then grinned sheepishly. "I'll, uh, go check on her. Brb."

He was gone in a flash, and while I was more than used to his speed, the wind gust made Dex jump. I giggled a bit at how cute he looked while surprised.

"What?" he asked me, confused but smiling cutely as he got really close to my face.

"Nothing, you're just adorable," I admitted, tittering behind my parted lips.

He gave my hand a squeeze, while the other made it's way up to cup the side of my face. His thumb traced my cheek, and I could feel blushed heat under his fingertips. The way he looked at me with such tenderness and care, his eyes sparkling with love, it was just enough to make me forget myself.

"You're beautiful," he said, just above a whisper, but intimate enough for my ears only.

"Ahem!"

Dex gave me a quick peck on the lips before we looked back at the other half of our date. As soon as I saw them, my stomach plummeted to the ground. Sonic was carrying another girl in his arms, and it just felt instantly wrong to me. I almost loudly shouted no, my face cringing in horror. I'd been held by him so many times, and that was kinda my spot. The girl was taller than me and just looked awkward being held by him.

If Dexter's touch was living in a delicate snow globe bubble surrounded by falling glitter, then seeing Sonic with another girl popped the bubble, the internal explosion in my heart gushing out a scattered mess. Tiny neglected sparkles of glitter littered the base of my heart, and I wanted Dexter to gently shake it so we could be once again protected by the flimsy veil of romantic bliss.

But it wasn't to be. The four of us headed into the theater, taking our seats together in a straight line. My boots felt like lead weighed them down the whole trek inside, as I just felt awful. Sonic with another girl was bothering me more than I wanted it to. All I could stare at were the neon LED lights tracing the dark carpet path to our seats.

I don't remember much of what happened next. Sonic got up to get us popcorn, before mistakenly sitting down next to me, leading to some jealous scoffing by his girl. I'd already forgotten her name. Sidney? Cindy? Doesn't matter. I'd been looking forward to this movie, as it was kinda a chick flick, but I was battling a sense of uneasiness through the two hour length of the film. I wasn't really bothered by Sonic and Cindy holding hands, or sharing popcorn or a kiss, or laughing together. What bothered me was the whole time, I was feeling terrible, and Dexter seemed so oblivious to my sour mood. I wanted to tell him I was upset, but what was I gonna say? "I'm being bullied online by my best friend's fangirls? I'm stupidly upset over my best friend seeing another girl? I want you to do more things for me without me telling you?" He'd be so careless about how I'd felt earlier, and with the movie ongoing I couldn't interrupt it.

So if I couldn't tell him, I wish he could just read my mind and my emotions and give me what I need without me having to ask for it. That's what a good boyfriend would do… but he didn't even try to hold me or reassure me or anything. I'd given anything for just a simple touch of affection, or his arm around my shoulder, but I was left neglected and cold until it was time to go home.

The other three wanted to go to dinner, but I declined and asked Dexter to take me home. He did, of course, but was still oblivious to my bad mood. He texted me cute hearts later that evening, but of course, I got another text that instantly stole my attention.

_"__Ames are you ok? You were quiet today." _

Sonic. Of course. He was a lot of things, a lot of frustrating and annoying things, but he did care about me. I hesitated, leaning back into my pillow. Indecisive of how much to tell him, or if I even should bring it up.

_"__Nothing, I guess I've been spending too much time with your fangirls."_ I paused before pressing send, but I did. It felt wrong as soon as my fingers left the button.

_"__?"_ was all he responded with.

_"__NVM, I'm gonna get some rest."_

I turned out the lights, but my wide-eyes kept staring at the ceiling long after the faint glow of the lightbulb faded away. My body may be tired, but my mind was wired with too much going on in my head. I willed myself to not open up the fangirl group chat again. I knew what would happen. I knew how it'd hurt me. But I couldn't help it. I hadn't checked in a few hours and I had to know what they were calling me now. Certainly they all knew about the double date, and I couldn't wait to read about my "slutty dress" and how I was "leading Sonic on". Sigh.

The trainwreck that greeted me there, however, shattered my hope of getting any sleep tonight.


	6. Chapter 6

_Lady Sonamy, Awesome know it all, bunnylass, XxCrimsonShadowxX, AutumnPrower697, Guest(x3): Ahh, so many reviews! Thank you thank you thank you! Lately I haven't been in the frame of mind to work on this story, but tonight I got some motivation from walking outside and enjoying the beautiful weather. I still can't believe this story is at 6 chapters now, it was supposed to be a oneshot. I'm so glad it turned into more than that, and all thanks to you awesome people that loved it so much and made me want to continue. This story wouldn't exist without you. _

_Thank you so much for your support. It means the world to me. _

* * *

SONIC

Okay, I'm seriously pissed. I'd had a decent day, a nice evening, the double date had turned out alright, and then as soon as I get home I text Ames to make sure she's okay. She was kinda quiet which is not like her at all, and I just wanted to check on her. But before I can go and do that, my phone had blown up with notifications - my fangirl group chat is a mess. I'm talking drama, mods being summoned everywhere, all caps messages. Normally I hardly ever talk in there, but I asked one of the mods what's going on - and then I see them.

Pinned in a collection together, the vile messages made me want to heave my guts. All manner of insults and threats and bullying words hurled at Amy Rose, making fun of every part of her. There had to be hundreds of them, and my finger was getting a workout just scrolling through them all. Each stroke of my thumb boiled the blood under my skin, my eyes narrowing in disgust as the letters mocked back at me.

That was it. No one, and I mean _no one_, talked about Amy like this. How dare they make a group that was supposed to be about how much they loved me, and turn it into this. I was pissed. To think these were all people who admired me, who looked up to me, and they all not only supported this, but were _laughing_ at it. They took the person I cared about more than anything in the world, and got their kicks from putting her down. Infuriating. I'm so angry I can barely speak right now.

And then, and then - the straw that broke the camel's back. A truly horrible sentence, one that I won't repeat here, and posted by none other than Cindy. Cindy had been contributing to this, the whole time. Cindy, my own girlfriend. I don't have words for the anger coursing through my veins as I tell this, I don't have time to process it. All I know is I had to do something, and quick. _Now. _

I dumped her immediately, 'course, no words other than "we're through", not gonna waste any more time on her. Then I tried to shut down the group. But apparently even though the groupchat is all about me, I don't actually own it, so I can't shut it down. I messaged each mod and asked them to stop with the Amy Rose bullying, but they refused, and actually _banned me from my own server._ Seriously, I can't even get in there anymore, I'm locked out. It was absolute bullshit that I couldn't do anything about this. But screw it, they can lock me out of my phone, but not the world. So I run all the way to the groupchat app's physical headquarters to ask them to shut it down, took me a whole 30 seconds - and turns out they're closed because it's the middle of the night. Not my smartest idea but I'm not about to sit at home alone, hell no.

So I cross the globe, blazing past the international date line into a timezone where the sun hasn't set, searching for an office building for this stupid app that isn't asleep. I rush inside and demand they shut down this horrible group chat due to hate speech and targeted bullying. No, I don't have any evidence, they kicked me out! No, I don't own the server but it's still public and has my name on it! I argue with them for what seems like forever until they finally, finally take it down and confirm with me the users and owners have been banned. Took like 10 hours, I swear. You'd think they'd know who I was!

Anyway, I'm heading home, and exhausted now. I'd stayed up hours and hours after I'd already been tired trying to fix this, and while my anger gave me a second wind, I'm ready to just collapse now. But before I do, I have to make this up to Amy. In person. There's a chance she didn't even see those messages, but if she did…

I traveled the familiar path to her house in near darkness, the sunrise at my back, thankful that I knew this way like the back of my hand. She was probably fast asleep, considering it was barely dawn, but I had to let her know I took care of this. I couldn't really knock on her door, could I? That might scare her. In the past, I'd thrown a rock at her window, and that felt like the way to go his time. Kinda felt bad about waking her up, but I'd feel even worse if she was in there having nightmares because of those terrible people online.

A few pebbles against the glass later, Amy finally opened her clean window with a squeak. Her beautiful face, complete with touseled quills, peeked behind her pink frilly curtains.

"Sonic," she hissed out the window. "Do you know what time it is?"

"No idea." I offered a small smile, then realized she probably couldn't see me. Amazing how my anger and exhaustion just melted away at seeing Amy Rose. I leaped through her window, landing next to her with a silly pose. She just glared and blinked at me.

"I was _asleep_, this better be _important_."

I had to chuckle at her grumpy pout. Man, I wanted to kiss those lips. No, no, couldn't be distracted.

"Amy, I hafta tell ya something important - "

"And it couldn't _wait_?"

"No. Ya see, I know... " my eyes glanced towards the phone on her nightstand, plugged in and recently used. Had she been asleep, or glued to that thing? I gulped. "I know about all the stuff they've been saying about you. In my groupchat thingie. And I'm sorry."

Her expression instantly changed for the worse, as if she'd deflated from a hot air balloon of anger to a sad remains of being popped. The girl sunk to the floor, her knees parted as she ran a shaky hand through her quills. I was so focused on her, I swear I saw tears before she even felt them. I wanted so badly to hug her, but couldn't find the will at the moment.

"Ames, you don't deserve this. I'd never have thought that, ya know, my feelings for you would make you a target or be such a disaster. Guess I've been focusin' too much on myself that I didn't see how you were feeling. But! I had to come and tell you I got it shut down."

She looked up at me suddenly. "That was you?"

"Yeah. It took a bit, couldn't shut it down myself, so kinda had to run across the globe to find somebody who works there who was awake, but I was so pissed that I had to."

"You did… what?" Amy scrambled up to her feet, making a beeline to her phone. "The server just disappeared and I was so scared that I'd been kicked out or…"

"No. I got them to shut the whole thing down and perma-ban everyone who said those awful things about you. I made sure of it. And then I had to come back here and tell ya."

"Sonic, you… ran across the world to..." her head shook in disbelief. "You didn't have to do this. You really are _extra_, you know that? You really are a hero. I didn't know you even knew. I'm sorry…"

"Hey, don't apologize, you have nothing to be sorry for." I was by her side instantly, my hand on her shoulder, giving her gentle rubs.

"Sonic, I… can't believe you did that for me - " she suddenly burst into tears, wrapping me in a hug with a ferocity I'd never felt before. She squeezed the air out of my lungs, stealing my breath, causing an intense high that left me instantly lightheaded. Her tears soaked my chest fur and I gasped for air until her arms freed me.

Amy backed away, embarrassed and wiping at her eyes and nose, sniffling. "Sorry, I just… their words really got to me."

"I…" I was equally embarrassed, and the hug had taken more out of me than I'd expected. I wanted to tell Amy that none of the stuff they said was true, that she was beautiful and amazing and kind and brave and smart and strong and I admired her more than anyone else in the universe. I wanted to tell her that she deserved so much more than the world. But, the reminder that she wasn't mine sunk in like a knife, leaving me bruised. I could normally shake off the feeling but my physical exhaustion was catching up with my emotions now.

"I should probably go," was all I said.

"No, please don't. I don't wanna be alone right now," Amy begged, her eyes suddenly huge, the tears in the corner made them sparkle with millions of emeralds.

"Ames, you should tell Dexter."

The words hit us both in the gut, but I had to say 'em.

"I did. I did, Sonic, but he didn't…"

I blurted out: "He didn't cross the world in the middle of the night to get the server shut down?"

Her smile was worth it, even with the eye roll. "No, he didn't." A frown quickly replaced her amused expression. "He didn't care either. He said I should just get over it. I kinda wish he would have said something a bit more comforting, but maybe he's right, and I was being too sensitive."

My heart was breaking for her, but also itching to leave this situation. I wanted to be here for Ames more than nearly everything, but not more than I knew was best for her. I had already experienced more than enough anger for one day, and I couldn't get mad at Dexter now, too. I couldn't exactly go find him in the middle of the night and shut him down like I had the server, as much as I'd daydreamed about that in the past few days.

"Ames, I just… " Shit, I was talking. "I just wanna say that, you're an amazing girl. And I know you're strong and can handle yourself, but I'll always be here for you. But now… now, I gotta go home and sleep."

I turned away to go, slower than usual. My head was spinning from too many emotions, and I just wanted to rest. But not head was hung, my eyes trained to the floor as I tried to leave - that I nearly ran over the pink hedgehog that was suddenly in my way.

"No." Amy stood in the door threshold with her arms crossed, a stern countenance that was nearly scary. "Look, you're about to fall asleep standing up. I can't let you go home like this."

"I'll be fine, I don't live far - "

"That's not the point!" Her voice raised, her bottom lip protruding stubbornly. "You don't just bust into my room and tell me that you got rid of my bullies and then go home. You're going to sleep here."

"Uh - " my face flamed bright red at the thought.

"No 'uh' from you, mister. Come with me."

She grabbed my wrist, effectively paralyzing me, as she marched us down the stairs. I followed willingly, very aware of her palm on my knuckles. I had to admit, as we approached the couch, it suddenly looked like a comfy and cozy place to nap.

"Amy, I shouldn't…" I weakly protested, knowing I shouldn't stay here but wanting to any way.

The girl ignored me as she buzzed around the living room, gathering up pillows and blankets to make my "bed". She carefully laid out a sheet for me, two huge pillows, and then warm duvet folded impossibly neatly. She patted the spot cutely, and my heart was beating wildly. Amy was so kind and caring, it was too much.

"You're not going anywhere, Sonic. You're exhausted and I can't let you run home in this state after what you've done for me. Now lie down."

"Okay… but just a cat nap." I glanced towards the window, noting the pale, early light on the horizon.

I sat myself down on the couch, fully intending to just rest for a little bit. I'd doze off and wake up in a few minutes, then make my way straight home. Ah man, this pillow was so fluffy, and the blankets were nice… ah -

I_ swear up and down_ I was only out for a few minutes when I groggily hear these whispered words that made me instantly bolt upright.

"Hey Dex? Uh, don't freak out, but… Sonic is asleep on my couch."


	7. Chapter 7

_Lady Sonamy, kimchi-tan, kimmypuff123, XxCrimsonShadowxX, SxA, 01SonAmy01: Thanks so much everyone! :) Also, thanks for your patience! I had to re-write this chapter from my first draft so it fit the style of the larger story. I am playing around with writing styles with this one, and it feels nice to stretch my writing muscles a bit. Hope y'all are enjoy this one~ _

* * *

AMY

So, it's nearly noon, and Sonic is still asleep on my couch. I've put off Dexter twice with lame excuses, but he said he is coming over right now. Even so, I don't have the heart to wake Sonic, after all he's done for me. Plus he looks so cute while he sleeps, and it's kinda nice to know that I had the fastest thing alive in one spot under my roof. Kinda comforting to know he was here. I just realized as long as we'd known each other, he'd never slept over before. My other male friends - Tails, even Knuckles - had, but Sonic had always refused in the past. I knew it wasn't because he didn't like me, so I guess it was out of respect? Either way it was kinda nice having him stay over, perhaps because he was not his normal hyperactive and annoying egotistical self while unconscious. As it was, I caught myself looking over towards him and smiling just a little bit.

The knock on the door, signaling the arrival of my boyfriend, immediately ruined whatever fondness I was feeling over Sonic. I sighed and opened up, hoping Sonic would have woken up from Dexter's banging on the door, but he was still out like a rock. Dex greeted me with a kiss, and I tried my best to block his view of the living room, but there was a clear view of the blue hedgehog asleep on my couch in just my peripheral vision. As we parted lips, Dex gave me that sexy grin that normally gave me butterflies, but this time they had all disappeared.

I smiled back, but knew it'd be better for me to break it to him up front. I said loudly, "Hey Dex? Uh, don't freak out, but… Sonic is asleep on my couch."

I'd been dreading Dexter's reaction all morning. Part of me had hoped he'd be cool about this, but considering how we had parted ways last night, deep down I knew that he wouldn't be thrilled. His frown, as he tried to peek over my shoulder, was not reassuring.

"I said don't freak out," I repeated, standing on my tiptoes to block his view with my head. Unfortunately he was taller than me, and his eyes narrowed. That was only the beginning.

Pandemonium kinda broke out - Sonic immediately awoke when he heard my voice, jumped up with panic in his eyes. Dexter demanded to know why I was letting Sonic stay here, especially since last night I had said I wasn't ready to sleep with him. That was the kicker, I knew. I tried to deescalate the situation by saying he had just helped me out with something late last night and needed a place to crash, but that just led to more questions, more suspicions, more indirect accusations from Dex. What had Sonic helped me with? Had I sent him away last night so I could sleep with Sonic instead? The jealousy and anger seemed to pour out of him, and I began to feel guilty. Even though I knew I hadn't done anything wrong, I knew nothing had happened - I should have known that Dexter was actually jealous over Sonic despite his claims to the contrary, and I should have woken up Sonic before Dex had even come over.

This was my fault.

Still, I was angry, too. "Why would I cheat and then keep the guy here? Do you think I'm an idiot _and _a liar?"

Dexter exhaled, crossed his arms, and turned away. I'd never seen him like this, so passionate. It hurt like hell he didn't trust me though. I turned to Sonic, realizing he'd been silent the whole time. The panic had left his eyes, but his expression was unreadable, just neutral. Typical of him to keep his mouth shut pm;u when I needed support. '_Say something!_' I mouthed to him.

"My dude," Sonic was at the other hedgehog's side in a second, clapping his shoulder. "You need to chill out. Nothing happened between us, 'k?"

Dexter looked down at Sonic's hand, and I could tell he thought better of trying to start a fight. We all knew who would win that one.

"But you wanted it to, didn't you? Why else would you have come by in the middle of the night, other than hoping to get some?"

"Dex!" I shouted, my cheeks flamed.

"I was here cuz - " Sonic paused uncharacteristically, his eyes darting to mine, causing my heart to skip. His answer was actually important, as I was the one to beg and insist he stay. Sonic would either tell the truth and throw me under the bus to my angry boyfriend, or lie. I suddenly wasn't afraid of Dexter's response, I just wanted to know what Sonic would do.

The dark blue hedgehog let go of Dex's shoulder, and looked down as if ashamed. "I'm gonna go now."

That was it. That was all he said, the only words to leave his lips before he rushed off in an explosion of wind. I was used to him taking off in a hurry, but this time punched me in the gut, leaving me winded and internally aching. It was useless to shout after him, but I did manage a soft "wait.." under my breath. He was already gone. Typical of him to leave me when I needed him here.

Dexter was still recovering from the shockwave of the sonic boom. I turned to him and opened my mouth, but not a moment later, Sonic was back in my house. Had he really come back for me?

Nope, just handed me back one of my pillows. I hadn't even realized he was holding it this whole time.

"Sorry, uh, didn't mean to take this with me, it was just so comfy. Thanks for letting me stay, okay, I'm leaving now - "

I dropped the pillow to grab his wrist, and fiercely looked into his eyes. "Sonic, please stay - "

"No. Leave." Dexter grabbed both of our hands to pull us apart.

"Hey pal, don't you_ dare _touch her like that!" Sonic shouted, jumping back to take a defensive pose, his fists cuffed.

"I can handle myself," I insisted. "Now please, help me explain - "

"You can tell me without him here," Dexter said, then turned to Sonic. "Get out of my girlfriend's house."

Sonic stood his ground. "Let me talk to her for a second. Alone."

"Like hell you will!"

"Guys, I'm right here. Dex, let me talk to Sonic. Please. You can stay if you want, just let me hear what he has to say. "

The lighter hedgehog backed off, and Sonic relaxed slightly. "Fine. But first tell me what he was doing with you last night. And it better not be what I think it is."

"It wasn't, believe me. I told you about those mean girls giving me death threats online, right? Well, Sonic made sure the server they were using got shut down."

Dexter just blinked, his anger fading to confusion. "_That's_ what this is? You're still upset about that? This whole thing is about_ that_?"

"Yes, Dexter!" I fumed, irritation pulling my voice. "This is about that. Girls were online calling me names and mocking every single part of me, forming a targeted hate group and wishing I would die and threatening to rape me, okay? They said some awful things, and it was affecting me a lot. Sonic ran halfway across the world at midnight so he could shut the server down for me. He came back exhausted, and I wanted to let him rest here. That's all. I promise you we didn't do anything else."

"I can't believe this. Why do you care so much what others think of you? I told you to just let it go and get over it. Why did you make him do all that for you?" He gasped in exasperation. "Look, I'm sorry they said all these things to you. They shouldn't have. But you can't live your life listening and believing what people say about you."

"You're saying I'm being too sensitive?"

"No… but you do have to have thicker skin, if you go on the internet at all. The haters just mean you're doing something right."

"Seriously? Did you read anything they were saying about me?"

"It doesn't matter, they're just words! You know how amazing you are, my _god_! Everyone gets made fun of online, Amy!"

I gasped, taken aback at how callous he was being. This wasn't the Dexter I'd come to know and love. He was normally so caring and supportive, what had gotten into him? In fact, he hadn't been himself since he saw Sonic on my couch.

I didn't know what to say, or even how to feel. I felt torn between two hedgehogs in a literal sense, too confused to be angry, too sad to pull out my hammer. But I was furious, underneath it all. I didn't have words right now, it was just all too much, in this current moment. I wanted to run away from both of them and be alone, yet I wanted to be held an reassured everything would be alright.

Sensing my frustration, both Sonic and Dexter seemed to soften up, as if I had just spilled a few tears. I couldn't even tell if I was crying or not, I felt numb.

"Amy, look… I'll go," Sonic said. "Okay? It'll make this easier, so I'll go."

That was the last thing I wanted. Even if my rational brain knew he was right. "No."

"Amy, I know you're happy with him, and all my being here is ruining this. All I've done is just hurt you when all I wanted was for you to be happy and smile. Let's just, chill from each other for now."

"What? No, Sonic, I don't want to lose you. Your friendship - "

"You're not losing me. But all that's gotten you is some big enemies and nearly your boyfriend. And I know how important romance is to ya. Take care, okay? And Dex, take care of her."

"...of course," my boyfriend finally said, gentler.

Sonic was about to rush off again, then he turned and looked me right in the eye, the resident sadness threatening to haunt me forever. "Amy, I know you don't need me, you can take care of yourself. But I'll always be here to protect you. Just call me if you need anything."

And then he really was gone, zooming away in mystery, and it sounds cliche but he took my heart with him. He must have, because why else would it feel like there was a gaping hole in my chest? All I could feel was what was missing, what had been taken from me. And god it _hurt_.

"Amy, I need to apologize. I totally overreacted, and I'm so sorry I said all that. I feel like shit now, I'm terrible. It's just hard not to be jealous of a guy like Sonic, who kinda has it all. Let me make it up to you, okay?"

His words may as well have been spoken to me underwater, because they sounded faint, distant, and barely grazed my ears. My eyes were fixed on the closed door Sonic had just left, wishing and willing him to come back through, like he just had. I'd never wanted to be with my best friend so badly.

"Ames?"

I cringed, only Sonic called me that.

"Can we, have our date another time?" I said, still avoiding eye contact. "I think I just need some time alone today. It's been emotionally exhausting."

"Okay," Dex leaned forward to plant a kiss on my forehead. "Text me later, okay?"

The door opened and shut again, taking the air with it. I was left alone, with the realization that Sonic leaving me behind was more painful than Dexter leaving me alone. What did that mean, though? Did I have feelings for Sonic now? If so, why - I'd known him forever and never had I thought of him like that. Never had that *spark* that was always present in the romantic movies and books I loved so much. I knew how love was supposed to feel, not only from all the media I consumed, but also first-hand, dating my first real crush. Sonic had never made me feel that way. At least, not until now. Watching him disappear into the horizon, using his speed to steal my hope instead of provide it - it was unexpectedly crushing.

Ugh, but, why now, after I already had a good guy that gave me everything I wanted… maybe Dexter wouldn't run across the world in the middle of the night for me, but -

-but, but - Sonic had always had feelings for me, and I know he'd treat me right. If I didn't love him, though, there was no point. And I didn't. Didn't love him. Despite what the hole in my chest was telling me, it was just over a missed friendship, not romance. It was platonic. I'd spent years hoping and waiting for love while Sonic was in my life, knowing he wasn't the one for me. Now I've finally found it in Dex, I told myself I'd never give it up for anything.

Not even the second most important relationship in my life.

I wasn't sure if I preferred the fleeting romantic butterflies for Dexter, or the fleeting spirit of Sonic. Despite his erratic behavior, Sonic was always loyal to me, and I know he thought the world of me. Thing was, I didn't want to have to choose, or have a preference. I wanted to have both of them, in different ways. I don't think either of them wanted that, though. It wasn't fair I had to choose. I don't think I could be happy without both of them in my life. I'd have to make that work, make that possible somehow. I'm so confused and torn between two hedgehogs, what do I even do?

For Dexter, well, my feelings for him are still here. My heart didn't quite race at seeing his name, hearing his voice. What did I have, what did I ever have, without that? That addictive, insane rush of warm, pleasant lava filling my heart, leaving me breathless. It felt long gone now, replaced with confusion and neediness and veiled anger and expectations. Maybe I needed to be alone right now, but I'd have to make up with Dexter sooner or later.

As for Sonic, well, he can't fulfill my dreams, he's not romantic at all. I mean, he has a lot going for him, but I'd never considered him my type. Why settle for someone I'm not madly in love with? Love is supposed to be amazing and feel nice. Right now the only feelings Sonic was giving me were pain and longing. If I really did love him deep down, if this was how love felt, I wanted nothing to do with it.


End file.
